Autobiography in Five Chapters
by Portia Nelson
Chapter One
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I fall in.
I am lost…
I am hopeless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter Two
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I’m in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in…it’s a habit
My eyes are open; I know where I am;
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
Chapter Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
Chapter Five
I walk down another street.
……………………………………………….
I wonder how many of us can resonate with this poem, making the same mistakes over and over again and ending up genuinely bemused as to how we got here?
I particularly like how she says to herself “It isn’t my fault” for the first three chapters until the penny drops, and she can see that no one else was responsible for putting her there but herself.
Albert Einstein said “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”.
Yet, despite knowing this to be a fact, we ignore it, continuing to cling to the familiar – rather than choosing change.
But we want changes to happen immediately if not sooner and often think we’ve failed when things take longer than expected.
Forgetting that change is a process, it takes time, and we need to be patient with ourselves as we evolve and learn a new way of being.
Becoming aware that we have the choice of either continuing to make the same mistakes, or opening our eyes to what may be keeping us firmly anchored to the past, preventing us taking on new challenges from which to learn and grow.
The message I take from this poem is that it’s my responsibility, meaning I have the ‘ability to respond’ in a number of different ways in relation to the path I choose. And recognising that change, rather than being scary, can be seen as a chance to grow. A chance to move forward and experience new things.
Are you resisting change, or are you able to walk down different street and open yourself up to something new?